If in those moments of grief, you needed to put the sacred, precious memories of your uncle in a place to save for a time where you would feel safer or more protected or more supported, then I'm grateful to you for listening to that. Disassociation gets a bad rap, but it's not necessarily a bad thing. Perhaps by not thinking about your uncle, it wasn't that there were something wrong with you, but maybe that was what your mind and body, and spirit needed to do to handle that loss in the moment for you. There are ebbs and flows, but there are no norms. Nelba Márquez-Greene: There's no norms in grief. It'll be a joke Ana told you or a video of her singing while her brother plays the piano, just these really beautiful, intimate moments from her life, and I kept thinking, like, how is she doing that? I was like, "Wait. Then I stumbled on your account, and it seemed to me like you were tweeting about your daughter, Ana Grace, every day. The way I was dealing with it was that I was trying every day not to think about him, because if I did, I would cry, and then I'd get upset with myself for crying. It was right around the time that my uncle died of cancer, and my family was having a really hard time. I've been wanting to talk to you for a while because I started following your Twitter account a few years ago. Tracy Hunt: I started with telling her what grief has been like for me. Why don't you light a candle? Set yourself calm. As we said hello, we were both preparing to talk about something really personal. Her dark, curly hair was on top of her head, like in a bun, and she was wearing this pink t-shirt with the word Latina in cursive written across it. Tracy Hunt: I hopped on the computer with her, and it immediately felt intimate. They talked to Tracy about grieving publicly and privately. Nelba's daughter, Ana Grace, was killed by a mass shooter at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Connecticut, and a year later, Celeste's daughter, Erica Robinson, was killed in a shooting at a nightclub in New Haven. Tracy turned to two mothers who know a lot about grieving, Nelba Márquez-Greene and Celeste Fulcher. She wondered if we're grieving properly, if at all, during this onslaught of death. Tracy had been thinking about the sheer volume of grief we've all experienced, from the pandemic to police killings of Black people to these just countless mass shootings. This latest horror took me back to a conversation that my WNYC colleague, Tracy Hunt, brought us last summer in the wake of yet another mass shoot shooting. Last week in Nashville, three adults and three children, all nine years old, were killed in yet another mass shooting.
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